You have to be pondering why I'm out on a Tuesday and thanks to the loads of people that has been kind enough to ask me, there goes; I sprained my ankle during SOC and I'm limping like an ah pek.

Dammnnnn..

So I got 2 days MC which means I've to book in later at 1930. Wednesday and Thursday will be recovery day in camp so training only starts on Friday which also makes Friday my book out day. -.-ll
Aye. I SWEAR I'm not kenging anything okay.

I've been bumping around the net and I seriously realized that there's a problem with the circle that I am in. With people looking out for the 'ideal' guy when they themselves are the ones sleeping around. This isn't sample packs where you can try the goods before actually deciding whether you want to keep him in bed with you or not. Gosh these people.

A friend told me that he was celebrating his 2 month anniversary with his partner. [like wooppi]
And he went, "EH Benji! 2 months okay! I never lasted 3 weeks before. Its finally time to settle down seems so long!"
And I went "uh-huh". He freaking changes his partners 7 times in a month for crying out loud and now you're telling me this ah?

I wanna tell his boyfriend this.

GOOD LUCK.

and I think it's time for me to start growing up.

benji

And now, anxiety is seriously kicking in. I swear the feeling really sucks, but yet a part of me keeps wanting me to go in. My parents has hence, also been treating me really well. I've planned my week out to the max already.
When it gets dark and night falls, time really flies so fast.

There has been really some issues going on out there. But duh, no names will be mentioned because I don't want things to get worst. I know better and I know whats going on. Don't think that by purposely acting all nice infront of people will actually gain you something. Seriously, maybe its the dual-personality thats brewing in you, but your words to seem to match your actions and your actions are so fake, I can tell whether that piece of Holston, Lagerfied, Dollarenta you're wearing is real or not in a mile.
Golden Horse Award certainly won't be going to you this year.

I've burn my last weekend out getting high, smoking tobacco and settling fights, 2 fights to be exact. However, never the less, I have to thank them for taking the effort. (well except 1)

So here I am, with the cool breeze from the air-conditioning, caressing my cheeks, with no one around, with no one to hug me and kiss me on the forehead before bed. Then the thinking starts, whether I caused this 3 years ago when I decided to take this path. Did I sign a petition to give everything up because of them.
Because I'm definitely feeling a sense of incompleteness now. Cause I'm awake when my world is half asleep.
If you get the meaning of "my world", then good for you. If you don't, then you'll prolly never will and I don't understand why you even bothered reading on.

So through thick and thin, I've battered the storms of gossips and swams of bitchings, and it made me change. It forced myself to be cornered and become this someone, so fearful, so famous, I wished I hadn't become.

Just with you. with you.
doesnt make me full.